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Accept Yourself for Genuine Happiness

by Tara Johnson
(San Jose, CA, USA)

Life isn’t the sweetest candy. Sometimes, when I feel like the world is just too heavy, I look around and find people who continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives.

And then thoughts come popping into my mind like bubbles from nowhere – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy stressful life?." Then I pause and observe for awhile… I figure out that maybe, they start to work on a place called self.

So, what can I do to become genuinely happy? - is the question that follows. And the answer that comes to mind immediately is...

I must love myself!

My theology professor once said that loving means accepting. Therefore, to love oneself means to accept that you are not a perfect being, but behind the imperfections must lie a great ounce of courage to be able to discover ways on how to improve your repertoire to recover from your mistakes.

Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment.

When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have – truly, you already know the answer to the question 'how to be genuinely happy'.

When we discover a small start somewhere from within, that small start will eventually lead to something else, and to something else. But if you keep questioning life as it has never done you any good, you will never be able to find genuine happiness.

I believe that life is finding out about right and wrong, trying and failing, wining and losing. These are things that happen as often as you inhale and exhale. Failure, in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming happy.

How to be genuinely happy in spite all these? I tell you… every time you exert effort to improve the quality of life and your being, whether it is cleaning up your home, helping a friend, taking care of your sick dog, fail on board exams and trying again, life gives you equivalent points for that.

Imagine life as a big score board like those which are used in the NFLs. Every time you take a step forward, you make scoring points. Wouldn’t it be nice to look at that board at the end of each game and think to yourself “Whew! I got a point today. I’m glad I gave it a shot.”, instead of looking at it all blank and murmur “Geez, I didn’t even hit a score today. I wish I had the guts to try out. We could have won!” and then walk away.

Genuine happiness isn’t about driving the hottest Formula 1 car, nor getting the employee of the year award, earning the highest 13th month pay, or beating the sales quota.

Sometimes, the most sought after prizes in life don’t always go to the fastest, the strongest, the bravest or not even the best.

So, how do you become genuinely happy?
Every one has his own definition of happiness.

Happiness for a writer may mean launching as much best selling books as possible. Happiness for a basketball rookie may mean getting the rookie of the year award. Happiness for a beggar may mean receiving a lot of coins today.
Happiness for a business man may mean success.

So, really now, how do you become genuinely happy?

Simple. You don’t have to have the best things in this world. Its about doing and making the best out of every single thing. When you find yourself smiling at your own mistake and telling your self “Oh, I’ll do better next time”, you carry with you a flame of strong will power to persevere that may spread out like a brush fire.

You possess a willingness to stand up again and try – that will make you a genuinely happy person.

When you learn to accept yourself and your own faults, you'll know you have passed the test in the project “how to become genuinely happy”.

For as long as you know how to accept others, you will also be accepted. For as long as you love and know how to love, you will receive love ten folds back.

Again, throw at me that same question “how to become genuinely happy?”. I’ll refer you to a friend of mine who strongly quoted...

"Most of us know that laughter is the best medicine to life’s aches and pain. But most of us don’t know that the best kind of laughter is laughter over oneself... Coz then you don’t just become happy… you become free."

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Accept Yourself for Genuine Happiness

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Apr 11, 2010
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Accepting yourself and others
by: Teresa

I agree, Tara, thank you. I think accepting your-"self" completely is key to being happy. We are all works in progress and when we can feel joy and gratitude for our journey through this life, then we begin to want to share that happiness with those around us.

It became obvious to me yesterday, as I went out on errands, that I was in a reluctant, stormy mood, and every encounter with another human being, began to go very wrong - one sales clerk took my $20 and gave me change as if I'd given a $10; another young lady could barely speak English and tried to charge me double for a cookie in a small bakeshop; in the laundry room there was a woman clinging possessively to the one "good" dryer in the room. All of this made me feel quite unhappy to say the least.

However, it suddenly dawned on me, that in these situations I could be bringing the humor, the relief - rather than being annoyed and dismayed, I could accept other people, "let them off the hook" just as I would hope they would do for me, if I were the one making the annoying "mistakes" and causing frustration to others.

So I changed my tune, made a small gentle comment to the woman in the laundry room, who began to smile, and then chat in a warm, happy way that turned everything around. Soon I found my natural sunny attitude restored.

So I think it's best to try to take into consideration the point of view of the other souls around us, to try to remember, that given the choice, they want "this moment" to be as happy as you do - and then help both of you to share that happiness together.

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